I lay on a
pillow of darkness
Pure black
Except for the
tiny flecks of light
Moving in
random patterns
I imagine
intersecting lines
at 35-degree
angles from each other.
they fade intermittently
and form
other shapes
I cannot
remember the shapes
I cannot
describe them
xxx
I feel as if
I disappear.
perhaps for
a few moments
perhaps
forever.
I become
invisible
a thing that
was
but is no
more.
Xxx
I hate the
graveyards
the long
lines of tombstones
lawns
overgrown with weeds
decaying
presents for the dead,
weathered
teddy bears and deflated balloons.
I hate the
roses left to decompose in the sun,
To be later
thrown in metal dumpsters
like
forgotten dreams
unspoken
conversations.
I hate all
of it.
the sales people
the ground
crew men in dirty pants
the people
looking for solace amongst quiet bones.
xxx
i want
freedom
water
waves
I want to
slide into oblivion like the other nameless souls
come and now
gone.
Will anyone
find our music
our words
our small
attempts at transformation?
xxx
I lay on a
pillow of darkness
floating somewhere
between ocean and desert
between hot
and cold
between life
and death
The desert
now blooms with newfound moisture,
purple
flowers and panting lizards,
mermaid
clouds.
The oceans
begin to sing,
singing of
sun trees and orange fruit that drip with sugar,
forming
puddles
lakes and
creatures that would become myths
and great
dreams and nightmares.
xxx
I will
become nameless
i will
descend into the chaos I came from.
Into the
blood,
the dirt,
the
blackness
the specks
of light in strange patterns
the
nothingness that somehow becomes something.
xxx
Out of the
chaos I am whole
for a
moment,
such a short
moment.
I am a
sentence,
a name,
two
sentences and then another,
and then one
year, and then another.
I emerge
from rough ideas
and soft
kisses
from pain
and chaos
from dirt
and blood
from stories
that were lost by people I never met
from stories
that may be told long after I’m gone
I am all the
people that are now lost,
forgotten,
buried in
the blackness
in the
darkness
in the soil
that made me,
the waves
that quenched me
the sun
which fed me,
the same sun
which crushed and bruised
and landed
on my lips
that touched
my eyes
and made me
whole,
the sun that
pulled me out of the darkness
for a
moment,
such a short
moment.
